Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts

Friday, December 31, 2010

My 2011 : An Stellar Insight !


I don't believe in this stellar thing,Fortunetelling has always been meaningless to me .So : It is just for fun!  Pedram

Romantic Overview:
Your love life is beyond rich and transformational again this year. After enduring a prolonged deprivation spell, where true love seemed like something that only happened to other people, your turn for real love has arrived. Chances are you're already in the midst of a very soulful tryst that began last year. But if you happen to be one of the remaining diehard hermits, get ready to experience one of the most intense romantic encounters of your lifetime. Your birthday season tops the charts in garnishing romance and pleasure, so be sure to take some time off to properly enjoy the amorous gifts of Venus.

You've got two powerful planetary energies working to make your love life the stuff movies and dreams are made of (and for the long haul.) Neptune, the planet of dreams and soulful experience will take up residence in your relationship sector this April to bring you a preview of what's to come for the next fourteen years in radically spiritualizing your relationships. And then Pluto, the god of the underworld continues the excavation begun in 2008 in your romance sector. Over the next 14 years you can count on Pluto to bring unparalleled intensity and reveal hidden aspects of your self through the vehicle of romance. Nothing light or frivolous anymore when it comes to love, Virgo. If it's not a soul connection that will transform every fiber of your being, you'll quickly lose interest.




Career Overview:
Now that Chiron is finally coming out of your work sector this February after an extended seven-year saga of pushing every social insecurity button known to man, your work environment should be considerably less painful. If you've had trouble with co-workers or employees, you'll finally feel like you're getting some thicker skin compliments of Neptune moving out of your work sector between April and August. Use this planetary reprieve to take a more detached attitude towards all of the drama.

The absence of Chiron and Neptune in your work sector facilitates renewed confidence in your talents. You can stop second-guessing your skills and put more energy into furthering your assets. With a major eclipse pattern hitting your career sector in June, you can expect monumental changes to occur in your professional life between June and next January. This is the year for your hard work to pay off. Plus the lessons of compassion and heightened sensitivity you've learned over the past several years will only work to serve you in reading people's subliminal motives and assess who is a true ally and who to avoid at all costs when doing business.
Between the end of January and June, Jupiter comes back to bless your sector of legacy and other people's money. You'll likely be gifted with a considerable karmic jackpot in the form of a donation, gift, inheritance or loan. Do you still have issues receiving? Now is not the time to look any gift horses in the mouth Virgo. You've more than paid your dues with the amount of free help, guidance and other such service and now it's your time to receive and replenish the well.
Pic: Virgo,The Virgin Or Maiden @Wikipedia

Friday, December 17, 2010

10 Strange But True Christmas Crimes

Many criminals see the holiday season as their opportunity to cash in. But while many of the crimes committed around Christmas center around theft of presents, there are a few that are so strange that they definitely deserve a special place on Santa’s naughty. Here are 10 strange but true Christmas crimes:
Image: Nativity scene



1. Stolen Baby Jesus:
What’s stranger, stealing a doll depicting what many believe is the son of God, or using GPS and high tech cameras to protect the display? Regardless of your belief, stealing an important religious symbol for no other reason than to vandalize seems like a very Grinch-esque activity. But then again, having a good excuse to ask Santa for an advanced GPS system has its perks. If you see a vandal robbing a nativity scene of Baby Jesus, and the GPS tracking system hasn’t already done it for you, report the incident to authorities.


2. Wal-Mart Stampede:
People really go wild over Christmas gadgets and gizmos. So wild, in fact, that they behave like wild animals and stampede into large retail stores hoping to get the best deal on the coolest new items. But recently this trend has taken a decidedly less innocent turn, as workers and bystanders have been trampled by frenzied shoppers. This Christmas, remember why we really celebrate the holidays and get your shopping done in a decidedly less deadly fashion.

3. Stolen Christmas Trees:
This may be the only time of year where stealing a tree represents an attractive and potentially profitable opportunity for a criminal. It’s no surprise that the rates of petty theft and robbery rise during the Christmas season, but Christmas trees? Really? If you see a tree being stolen from a commercial lot, do your civic duty and report the criminal to the authorities. They’ll be out in force this year cracking down on a truly bizarre crime.

4. Drunken Parade Float Driving:
Everyone enjoys the Christmas parade. But when this parade float driver sped past another float and raced towards Main street, police knew something was wrong. The driver turned out to be drunk, and the story turned out to be one of the most bizarre Christmas crimes in history. This season, be careful with the eggnog, especially if it’s your job to drive the Christmas float the next day.

5. Nativity Scene Vandalism:
Not believing in Santa Claus is one thing. Venting your rage upon carefully crafted nativity scenes by writing satanic symbols with spray paint is another. Watch out this year because police are out in force to protect these displays of peace and love from any number of criminal Grinches.


6. Frosty Stabbing:
Frosty, after surviving 2 initial stabbing attempts finally succumbed to his wounds while the perpetrators were tracked down and charge with — vandalism? Yes, Frosty may have been a 12-foot tall inflatable snowman, but does that mean he deserves to be repeatedly stabbed? Absolutely not. The teenage perpetrators were caught in this case, but around Christmas this type of vandalism often goes unsolved.

7. Christmas Tree Cannabis:
The Christmas tree is one of the most iconic symbols of the holiday season. In this bizarre turn on a Christmas classic, the Christmas tree was made entirely of illegal marijuana. While it may have looked similar to a normal tree, setting it on fire may have some interesting effects on those nearby. Perhaps it’s not the best idea to use your illegal drugs as your celebration of the holiday season.

8. Cannabis Christmas Card:
In this strange story, a woman visiting her boyfriend in prison wanted to surprise him with a heart-felt Christmas card. The catch? The card contained a heaping helping of illegal marijuana, which is generally frowned upon in prison. After being caught, she may have an opportunity to join her boyfriend behind bars next holiday season.

9. Naughty Santa Claus:
Children really enjoy telling Santa what they want for Christmas, and adults enjoy the idea of Santa perhaps just as much. But when Santa starts telling dirty and offensive jokes at the work place (not the North Pole), Santa is going to get a nice pink slip for Christmas. Merry unemployment, Santa. And a happy new harassment charge next year!

10. The Santa Claus Bandti:
Yes, you read that right. A man who looked suspiciously like Santa Claus had become one of the most prolific bank robbers in recent memory before being caught and arrested. We always knew that Santa was independently wealthy, but we never guessed that this was what funded his North Pole operation.

 
@ http://www.criminaljusticedegreesguide.com/
special thanks to Susan Kilroy for sharing this article.

Monday, December 13, 2010